Monday, May 21, 2007
Monday morning meeting
I was moving slowly this morning, trying to wake up for the start of the week as I drove to the train station at 5:55am. Thinking the normal morning product thought (“I wonder if there’s time to get a coffee?”)… when I suddenly get this sense, out of nowhere, that I’ll probably hit a deer on this fine Monday morning (really...this was the actual thought - a very weird thing)- so, I slowed down a bit – to about 35mph. That thought was quickly followed by a memory of running directly over a suicidal bunny last week, which, I swear, did this head-first dive (on this very same road) directly into my rolling right front tire, as if I was about to run over a very tasty looking carrot and he figured he could beat me to it... just like in that book of bunny suicides... So, with that unpleasant thought in my mind, I found myself trying to recall the cartoons from that book... and within seconds, I caught about 2 frames worth of a speeding deer out of my left eye and “Thwack-bam!”, I hit that deer with barely enough time to just touch the brake and brace myself with both hands on the steering wheel. In an empathetic harmony, I simultaneously let out an audible “Uh!” as I saw a bit of deer dust (and maybe a slight splash – yuk) spray from my right front fender. I looked in the rear view mirror to see the deer collapse (rather peacefully) by the roadside and within the next 5 seconds a thousand thoughts raced through my mind as my heart rate built up to an all out sprint... I thought about whether my car was damaged, and whether I should stop... thanked the deer for not being big enough or high enough to trigger my airbags or smash through my windshield... wondered if anyone saw this spectacle of the deer-infested suburbs... wondered if the deer saw my face as clearly as I saw hers...and...then... I thought about whether there was a market for The Book of Deer Suicides.